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Idiocracy is here:<br />Tbogg nailed it:"If the terrorists are smart, they will give up on trying to attack us and just sit back and wait, because eventually our entire country is going to be so stupid that people will start sticking their tongues in wall sockets just to see what electricity tastes like."...

As W. C. Fields once said, "It was a woman who drove me to drink and I never even had the courtesy to thank her for it." And according to this latest study showing that abstainers have higher mortality rates than either heavy or moderate drinkers,  I owe additional thanks for a few extra years of life. "...the researchers (a six-member team led by psychologist Charles Holahan of the University of Texas at Austin) found...

A pre-recorded crash message??? "British Airways apologised to passengers after an emergency message warning they were about to crash into the sea was played by mistake. About 275 passengers were on the London Heathrow to Hong Kong flight on Tuesday evening when the automated message went out. The plane was flying over the North Sea at the time. Cabin crew quickly realised the error and moved to reassure the terrified passengers. A spokesman for British...

If I may delve into the worlds of sports and popular culture for a minute or two, and now that his divorce is final, I have a question I would like to ask Mr. Eldrick Woods. Was it worth it? Was it worth losing your wife (a former Swedish swimsuit model, you moron. What the hell do you want?) your children, your reputation, your carefully constructed image, somewhere in the neighborhood of $500 million-give or...

I can see it now. Cage matches on the floor of the U.S. Senate. Harry Reid and Mitch McConnell in a loser leaves town, no holds barred, Texas death match to decide the fate of health care reform. Chuck Schumer hits John Cornyn on the head with a folding chair during an argument over extending tax cuts. Stacy Keibler on CSPAN (OK, that part might not be so bad)."Former World Wrestling Entertainment CEO Linda McMahon...

My wife had the honor of jury duty this week and became one of the many people that get turned away because they don't match the thinking of the prosecution or defense. Of course, she has gotten further in the process than I ever have. Given that, the case she might have sat on is one of the many that cause of us to rethink the ways our laws and punishments work. I know many...

Sarah Palin's Shakespearean creation of the word "refudiate" reminded me of the Master of the Malapropism, comedian Norm Crosby. For those too young to remember, Crosby was a regular on the old Dean Martin Celebrity Roasts. Here's some classic Crosby roasting Kirk Douglas:...

This is a personal rant of mine, so you will have to forgive the whole tenor of this particular piece. Self-esteem seems like a very focused issue, but it seems to rearing its ugly head in a lot of places. Let me start with the political and bring it down to the other level. President Barack Obama is persona non grata at NASA these days. People like my wife want to make sure there is...

The only surprise here is that anyone would be surprised:"The 5th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals swiftly denied the U.S. government's request to restore the ban on deepwater drilling while the case is on appeal in a 2-to-1 decision shortly after oral arguments Thursday afternoon. The ruling came as a surprise, because at the conclusion of the hour long hearing Thursday afternoon, Judge W. Eugene Davis of Lafayette, who was appointed by President Ronald Reagan...

The late, great George Carlin on the real owners of the country. From Down With Tyranny (profanity warning):&lt;br /&gt; ...